Morph and Nightcrawler's Quickies
by Tragically Nimaweh
Summary: A selection of one shots written when I was 11. That's 11 years ago. Cute if nothing else. The unlikely duo traverse the land embarking on several stupid adventures with humorous results...in a naive and innocent sort of way. Chapt 3 up: magnum opis
1. Intro and Chunky Joe's Car Fixing Place

This is a set of cheesy stories I wrote, sometimes collaborating with my brother while we were somewhere between the ages of 10 and 12. Nightcrawler(mine) and Morph(his) were our favorite X-men characters. We took those two action figures everywhere and they were always key figures when we "played X-men." This spawned many quirky adventures with the lovable duo which eventually made it into writing. I've chosen to post these stories just for giggles. To laugh at an adolescents sense of humor and to see my own strides I've made in writing. In order to uphold the integrity of the stories, I've elected to keep in all grammatical and spelling errors, as well as comical malaprops.

Stories written in league with my bro will be identified with his written portions in italics.

**Morph and Nightcrawler's Quickies: The First**

"Beat this Morph! I have four Aces!" Nightcrawler says laying down his cards. He bet all his money on that hand, he had to win. Morph stretched out in his chair and yawned.

"Well Nightcrawler I don't know about that. I have five Aces!"

"Man I really thought I was gonna win!" Nightcrawler pushed his money to Morph. Morph snickered as he took the money. He can cheat so easily playing against Nightcrawler.

"Now what are we going to do with this money?" Morph said fanning himself with the money. "I know, I'll open an auto repair. I'll call it: Chunky Joe's Car Fixing Place."

"Good idea Morph, let's open it right away." Nightcrawler said jumping up. They built it that day and opened it the next. The first day they had a Volkswagon beetle come in.

"Okay whats your problem." Morph said.

"Well it was making a ticka ticka sound and then a puff puff sound and then it stopped."

"Let me take a look at it." He lifted up the hood and looked in. "I see your problem, you have no engine!"

"Um… that's the trunk." the owner said.

"What kind of mixed up car has two trunks instead of an engine?"

"The engines in the back"

Morph looked in the back. "What's that?" Morph asked.

"The engine."

"Oh… What's that?"

"That's the carburetor."

"I'm sorry, lady, your car's too mixed up for me. Go away." And with that Morph closed Chunky Joe's Car Fixing Place.


	2. Tea Time with Blood and Guts

-1This particular story was written using an activity everyone may remember doing in English class. I think I wrote for 1minute and then my brother wrote for 1 minute. I can't remember the time frame but that's not important. The bits my bro wrote are in italics.

I might mention that I misused the word "Vaseline." I believe I was going for Valvoline, as if Nighty was drinking oil instead of tea. It meant nothing to an eleven year old, but now in my perverted little 22 year old mind, it's a bit funny in the wrong way.

**Morph and Nightcrawlers's Quickies: The collaboration**

Nightcrawler sat outside the mansion in their cast backyard. He was playing tea time with his imaginary friends. "Okay Bob pass the Vaseline. Hey! Don't you eat those cookies, those are for the ants!" He said.

_Meanwhile Morph was at the other end of the backyard playing blood and guts war with his imaginary friends Rambo, Tirminater, Robocop and Fred. _

Nightcrawler's imaginary friends ran away when Rambo came and shot lil' Earl. Nightcrawler jumped up and drew his sword. "You'll never take my Vaseline!" He yelled as he stabed Rambo. "Come if you dare. Never underestimate the little blue guy!" He said looking around.

"_Hey Nightcrawler put that thing away you could poke someone's eye out!"_ _Morph said. _

"Guten Tag Morph. You have to get me new imaginary friends. You scared mine away. Oh! Mein Gott! Nein! Nein!" Nightcrawler screamed other german words that Morph couldn't understand. A shadow was cast across the ground as a giant misqueto flew over head looking for juicy

_prey. Then Morph pulled out a big Flame througher and toasted the Misqeto. Then Morph took a big bite and said "mmmm. It tastes just like chicken." _

"Let me have a bite." said Nightcrawler. Blood spurted out of the Misqeutos abdomen. "Nevermind I don't want any." And with that they walked away.


	3. The Rare Jellyfish

-1**Nightcrawler ad Morph's Quickies: Magnum Opus **

It was a beautiful day at the X-men Mansion, the birds were singing, the sky was blue, and for some unknown reason the grass was blue too, but that doesn't matter. It was a beautiful day as Morph wandered the X-mansion premises. As Morph walked passed Nightcrawler's Secret Invention Making Place Where Cool Inventions Are Made (the NSIMPWCIAM as it says on the door), he heard a rustling coming from inside. Morph gave the secret knock and when Nightcrawler didn't answer, he opened the door and walked in.

"What're you up to?" Morph asked stepping over thing-ama-bobbers and whats-a-mo-whosits. He kicked a head-answering machine and jumped out of the way of a wall-mover. He ducked under a bouncy thing as it hopped along.

"Huh? Oh hi Morph. I'm looking for the rest of my hi tech edible diving suit. I found part of it being used as a door stop and decided I should try it out…I know. We could go hunt that rare jelly fish we saw in the paper." Nightcrawler said standing up.

"I got a better idea. We could go hunt that rare jellyfish we saw in the paper." morph said.

"Great idea. What would we do with it?" Nightcrawler asked.

"We're gonna eat it. But where does the rare jellyfish live?" Morph pondered

"In the water?" Nightcrawler offered.

"I think the article said they lived in the Native-American Ocean. Let's go." The two left then and there. Nightcrawler took the article with him. Swimming through the water, he read the article.

"It says here there is only one rare jellyfish left and it lives in this vicinity." Nightcrawler said.

"I think I see it." Morph hushed Nightcrawler. "It's tiny" As they got closer the rare jellyfish got bigger. Morph turned into a spear and charged. One of the eight tentacles grabbed Morph and squeezed. He changed back to normal and his head popped off. It grabbed at Nightcrawler, but he popped to tops off his carbonated soda drink rocket pack and fizzed away from the giant jellyfish. Morph punched it's head with little effect.

"It says here that the rare jellyfish's only defense is to scare its enemies with little bright yellow fans that come out of it's head." Nightcrawler said waving the article.

"Oh that's good." Morph said relieved. After smashing, squeezing, biting, and inking Morph, the rare jellyfish got bored and went away.

"Wait. It says here that the rare jellyfish is only 6 inches in diameter." Nightcrawler said.

"You know what this means?" Morph asked shaking Nightcrawler.

"We shrunk! Oh no! I knew I couldn't get this diving suit wet." Nightcrawler swam in frantic circles.

"No. We've been after the wrong thing. That's the rare jellyfish." Morph pointed to a small white creature that frilled up little yellow fans when it saw them. "That couldn't feed the two of us!" Morph cried.

"But maybe we could keep it as a pet." Nightcrawler offered.

"No. That wouldn't do." Morph scratched his head thinking. "I got it. We could keep it as a pet!"

"That's a great idea, Morph! Wait…Didn't I just say that?" Nightcrawler was confused.

"No you said we could give it a corvette." Morph corrected.

"Now that would be stupid. Why did I say that? You always have the greatest ideas. I wish I could think of things like that." Nightcrawler was envious.

"We could make a habitat just like this. Using the wall-mover invention, I'm sure we could make room for a tank." Morph began. While they were making suggestions about what they would do for the jellyfish, the giant squid came back by and ate it. The two stared, mouths gaped open. "Aw well" Morph shrugged. "Lets go eat that diving suit." And with that they swam away.


End file.
